Help, I’m pregnant but I don’t know who the father is! “Whose baby is this?” It’s not a rare question...Read More
They’ve known you all your life. They are your biggest fans and, at times, your worst critics (at least that’s the way it may feel sometimes). But through it all you know how much they love you. You know that no matter what life throws at you, they’ve got your back. But now that belief is going to be put to the test with an unplanned pregnancy. You know you need their advice and, maybe you even need their help. So it’s time to face the music. It’s time to muster the courage to have an incredibly awkward and difficult conversation. Take a deep breath and consider these four tips.
First, choose the right time. Decide in advance how you will tell them. Will it be in person? In a handwritten note? It goes without saying, a text might not be the best form of communication. Will you be alone? Will someone be with you? Will you be at home or somewhere else? Will it be in the morning or evening? Think through all of these details in advance. Choose a time and a place where you will have the chance to sit down and talk without any interruptions. You want to be sure to provide space for them to process what you’ve said.
Second, choose the right words. In sharing hard news, it’s sometimes tempting to try to play down your words (“It’s no big deal) or try to shift blame (“It really isn’t my fault”). Resist the temptation to do either. Instead, be real. If you are feeling scared or overwhelmed, tell them. They need to know how you are thinking and feeling so they can best help you.
Third, choose the right response. Decide beforehand that you will remain calm and not allow the conversation to become a shouting match. They may be upset and may yell. They may yell a lot. Remember that this is just their initial response. Once they’ve had time to process, they will likely calm down and be ready to help you figure out what to do next.
Finally, choose to believe the best. Your world is not coming to an end because of an unplanned pregnancy. You have options. At Alcove Health Women’s Clinic in Newport News, we provide a safe space for you to process your options, along with the medically accurate information you need to make an informed decision. Call us today at 757-591-8141 to schedule your free appointment.